Recently I learned that apologies don't always work. I have no idea how to exactly fix this mess I started, but I still have to try. So, I've apologized, you've said you believe me when I said that I'm sorry. But... Why should you believe me? How could you believe anything I say anymore? I'm trying to contradict myself, I'm just stating facts. I'm not going to give up until I have the chance of apologizing face to face/person to person to you. I know no doubt you'll read this Mirc, but i have a strong doubt you will reply. But I could be wrong. I've apologized in text I've apologized over the phone, to me though, that isn't enough. I know that I was wrong with how I lied to you and you were hurt and as was your father. I know I've lost any chance that I ever had with you. I guess its time to just learn how to accept that fact. But I want to at least be worthy of your friendship. I bet you don't like me spilling this over the internet, but isn't that how it all started? I want people to know my mistake. I deserve to be judged. I have to do something though because I can't get over you. I'm tired of crying over it. I want to know that you truly do forgive me.While I was lying to you I figured I could control my feelings. I was afraid to be myself, I didn't know how to begin to show how much I liked you. After living with my aunt for those two years, I didn't know how to love or show affection, but I have to take responsibility for my actions. So I couldn't keep my feelings at bay... I wound up falling for you anyways. Now I know that it isn't easy to control feelings. And lying makes it worse.

Now all I I can do is tell you the truth...
I'm sorry and i love you. No matter what happens I'll never stop thinking about you. I want to at least be your friend when its all said and done. After all I know that you'll never want to be more than friends now.

This is all I know to say...
I'm sorry.
I love you.

And that lie about in time wounds will heal, that person is a liar...

One more thing... Today marks a year from the first comment I left you.