hi.... really long story - i shall shorten it as much as i can!

so basically 2 years i started a new job as a fresh faced 16yr old and instantly started to fancy mr p a 20 yr old co worker. he had a girlfreind and it was just a weird teenage thing i had for him, although i never told him he blatently knew. i started going out with another collegue and mr p turned really mean towards me, shortly after we both left the job.

A few months on we started emailing each other and got on really well and eventually had a catch up which lead to another catch up and another catch up.... we text each other 24/7 and got quite close. shortly after his gf left him to go traveling he was devvod and i was his rock. i spent most of the time constantly assuring him that he would get back with her (so he didnt think i fancied him) altough he was adament that it wasnt going to happen. we continued to stay in touch and met on a regular basis, he kept asking me to go drinking with me but i refused knowing i would make a fooool out of my self. i eventually gave in and went out with him on my bday with his mates. he bought me drinnkkks all night and even this amazing giant birthday cake. i distanced myself from him so i wouldent tell him i fancied him and ended up getting off with his not so attractive freind.... first time it happened he got mad at his mate but.... it happened several times on several occasions he laughed it off and like a month later he invited me out so i begrudgingly went, had the best night ever with him and we had such a laugh... i woke up IN HIS covered in sick which he had to clean up! looking back its quite funny mwhaha. anyway basically he now has a gf and it proper eats me up inside as looking back and reading old texts and that its clear he liked me and my own insecurities persuaded me he thought otherwise.. now it proper eats me up inside when i think about him and what could have been. he went quite for a bit when he started dating his new gf but now we have started catching up again, he makes me laugh so much and i have had these strong feelings for him for nearly 3 years... basically i never told him my feelings for him and im leaving next month should i tell him i had feelings for him and the reason i kept pushing him back was because i thought he wouldnt like me or should i keep my mouth shut?!

either way i need to think of a song to dedicate to him when we go out for the last time... any cheesy ideas?

thanksss!